A lot has happened since I last wrote.  I kind of got bored with xanga and found it pointless, but I figured I'd update on my life.

At the beginning of this semester, I was struggling with the decision to stay here at OBU, or to go back to Ft. Hood.  After a lot of talking and crying, I decided to stay here.  Unfortunately, I think I made the wrong choice.  On the upside, God is using my time here at OBU for the good.  He's helping me learn things about myself, and He's giving me a chance to spend some time with a few people that I might not have had the chance to spend time with.  A couple weeks ago, I was talking to my parents and they've noticed that something was wrong.  I've been miserable here.  I talked it over with them, and I decided to transfer to a school in upstate New York.  With Mom and Dad moving to Germany, and Chris and Amanda moving to PA, this just seems like it's the best option.  Why stay at a place, wasting $20,000 a year to be depressed all the time?  It's really the best decision and I'm excited about it.  When I was having trouble deciding if I should stay or go, she told me that I just needed to decide and then not look back...and that's what I'm going to do.

For those of you who know about Scott, he gets out of the Marines in July.  I'll be living with his parents over the summer and then when he gets out, he'll be coming up to join us.  Then in the fall, we'll both start school in New York.  We're not exactly sure where yet, but we'll be figuring that out in the next couple of weeks.

I used to have friends at OBU, but since I moved away last year and came back, people just haven't included me in anything (not that they ever did to begin with).  One of my best girl friends transferred over the summer to another school and that's been hard.  Friends I thought I had, turned out to be just like everyone else here.  It's sad...especially when I really thought these people cared about me.  I guess that just goes to show that after everything I've been through, I still trust people too easily.  I'm tired of dealing with the people here.  I have no patience for them anymore.  I want to be around people who are real and not putting on a show.  If you're going to cuss me out...cuss me out...but don't turn around and tell me to have a blessed day afterwards.  I'm ready to be around people who don't pretend to be something they're not.  But ya know what...do what you want.  Pretend to be who you want.  God knows who you are and what's really in your heart.  You might be able to fool those around you, who are doing the same thing, but God knows the truth.  It just disgusts me to be around the people at OBU.  I wanted to love it here.  The truth is, I was blinded by a lot of this for my first 3 semesters.  But then I grew up, and the blindfold came off and I realized how sad OBU really is.  It's not the same university that it once was and neither are the people.

I'm just ready to leave.  Arkansas's been interesting.  It's not as great as I used to think (I lived here before, you know).  I've made a few friends, learned many things, and had life changing experiences, but it's time to go.  Time to move on and start a new chapter in my life.

Hello Xanga.  It's been a while.

So I found out some news this past week that will be changing my life completely.  It's scary, but I still have a little time to think and pray about the decisions I'll be making.  Please pray for my family.  We're gonna need it.

I start back with waitressing at El Chico on the 19th.  I'm excited, but nervous.

Dad is home, so it won't just be my mom and I for Christmas this year!  We made wonderful memories last year, but it will be great to have the whole family together again.

My sweetie has decided to come visit me over New Years!!  YAY!  I can't wait to see him!

I'm bored with Xanga.

I'm bored, period.

I have way too many things to do to be bored, and yet, here I sit....bored.

Quick update on my life:

The bonfire was tonight.  Over a hundred students coming from SPEC, heading toward the practice fields with torches...yup...it was creepy.  But it was fun too.  Thank goodness for layers and layers of clothes!

School is school.  Lots of reading and papers.  Enough said.

I'm good, but ready to go home.

Dad comes home in less than 2 weeks!

Yup...that's about it in the life of me right now.